All-Purpose Bread

On Monday mornings, our house smells great! With the big kids getting into a rhythm at school (it happens fast!), the smaller two and I are working on rhythms at home. And Monday is our day to make bread.

To be honest, despite having four kids (and all the research on the merits of ritual and repetition), rituals come slowly for me. I think about things for a long time before I actually implement. I've been working on this particular ritual for two years, but I finally think it's going to stick. I've got June to hold me to it. Plus it's fun.

The bread has a two-fold purpose. One is to get to eat it. (It's so fun to pick up Will and Clara and bring them warm bread.) And the other is to give some away.

Service to our kids means (1) picking up trash when we hike/river slosh/bike, or (2) cooking for people who are sick or having babies. It can be pretty insular day to day raising kids. We have communities through our schools, but we just don't do enough to connect with the larger world. It's something I think about a lot. So we're expanding our "Category 2" service and always make two loaves: one for us, and one to give away - to someone we know who needs some or to bring to our local shelter.

We did this a few times last year but it was bread-machine bread that always looked weird so I felt funny giving it away. But now I'm using an old recipe that is a winner! It came from a friend of a friend of mine at college, and was one her family had been making for years. It's so good, I wish I had learned a few more things from this friend. I certainly had a lot to learn.

For those who like to bake, the recipe follows these lovely pictures of John and his pants.

"Old Fashioned Honey Wheat Bread

Ingredients:

1 1/2 cup water

1 cup cream style cottage cheese

1/2 cup honey

1/4 cup butter

6 1/2 to 7 cups flour (I use half whole wheat)

2 T sugar

3 t salt

2 packages yeast

1 egg

Heat the 1st four ingredients in a saucepan until they're very warm (I make sure the butter has melted). Lightly spoon the flour into a measuring cup & level it off. Combine the warm liquid with 2 cups of flour and the remaining ingredients in a large bowl. Stir it all up. (Or mix it for 2 minutes at a medium speed. John threw away one of the stirers to our electric mixer, so we do it by hand.) By hand, stir in the remaining flour to make a stiff dough. Knead the dough on a well-floured surface until it is smooth and elastic (about 2 minutes). Place in a greased bowl and cover. Let it rise in a warm place until it doubles in size (40-60 minutes). Grease (not oil) two 9 x 5 loaf pans. Let it rise again. Bake at 350 degrees for 40-50 minutes.

Live and Read

Will is reading the Harry Potter books, a second time around. He's taking it to another level and is eagerly anticipating his 11th birthday, a/k/a his induction into Hogwarts. Around the house, we have potions,

and crow feather quills,

and dragon egg marbles cooking round the clock.

Then, we end the night with family quiddich.

(Clara caught this shot of John and me playing.)

Imagine if adults lived their books in the same way. I'd be opening a restaurant (A Homemade Life, by Molly Weizenburg), while living in a treehouse (On The Divinity of Second Chances, by Kaya McLaren). Sounds wonderful, actually. I think I'll try to stir up some quiddich-level family support.

Backyard Fountain

Our summer began with a project. When Clara and Jeff went on a trip right after school was out, the rest of us pledged to surprise them with a backyard fountain. The idea came from a single page, 8-step inspiration in Sunset Magazine.

We got all the supplies at the store and dug a hole in the hard Colorado clay 1 1/2 feet deep. Then, about 6 trips to the flower store to find the perfect pots, 3 trips to the hardware store, and 2 months later, we had it all assembled. With great excitement, we plugged in the pump and.... nothing happened.

So, it sat there for the rest of the summer. A sad sight really. I tried not to look at it. Then, just yesterday, I tested the plug. (Something I'd meant to do for weeks.) It turns out that all we needed to do was press the little activation button, and now... IT WORKS! We have a sweet little fountain just outside our bedroom window.

The gurgling sound it makes is more like water dripping into a plastic bucket (or in Jeff's words, someone doing a pee...) than a babbling brook, but still. It is a perfect place for little fingers to play. And after three months of the opposite, I now have a boost of confidence. (Can it really be a boost if my confidence had gone South for the 3 months it sat stagnant? Ummm. I've lost track. Yes.)

Next, we'll add pretty flowers around it. Probably in Spring, 2014.

A note of advice to future fountain makers: The hard part is finding a perfect bowl to fit inside your perfect pot. That, and making sure the chicken wire can actually hold the heavy pots. That, and getting plenty of caulk to keep the water from spilling into the big pot. That, and making sure your plug works. Otherwise, I guess it's easy...?

Poetry

In the past 24 hours, a plague seems to have struck our house. This is the first time that all 6 of us have been sick at the same time.

Going without food for two days has had the effect of presenting many 19th century poetic moments. If I were a poet, here are the fragments from our day that would find their way into to a poem:

• The clear, delicate way that June says "spi-tup."
• Clara's mastery of her sick look - languid, pale, pouty lips and a low head tilt.
• Will's small, muscular body reading his book between "spi-tups".
• Boisterous John carefully handing me a teeny, tiny paper clip as a gift.
• The red, red tomatoes growing on our vines.
• The relief of sinking into bed for a brief moment with John.
• The peaceful sound of the fan.
• The unusual, sick-house quiet: one reading, one sleeping on a bean-bag on the patio, one looking at a book, and one occupied with an abacus.

It was a day to get through - but was not without beauty.

Harvesting

Daily now, we are harvesting. It's such a wonderful season. Our garden is small this year, but giving.

Why Sleep?

Sleepy John

My days lately are disproportionately consumed with little John. He's sleep deprived and cranky. We're working on it. Personally, I could do baby forever. Then around 14 months old, I find it tough since he'll no longer sleep with/on me while I'm on the move. And much as it sounds appealing to spend 1/3 of my day with him in bed, I have to be on the move.

So, here is John's top ten list of why he can't sleep, from John:

10. These dancing boats that June hung over my bed are very distracting.

9. I need the black-out blinds that my mom bought (for her 4th child who is 1), but has never gotten around to hanging up.

8. These teeth were made for biting!

7. The cat is scratching on my door, and I want to pull his tail.

6. I need to finish emptying the sand box.

5. These white noise things in my room are too loud. I can still hear my brother and sisters out there anyway. And why aren't THEY sleeping?

4. I can't stop thinking about how I got busted this morning with cat hair AND June's hair stuck on my jelly-covered fingers.

3. I need to practice my pitch - my throw AND my scream.

2. I don't FEEL like sleeping.

1. BOOBS!

Together and Still

Jeff and I were born one week apart. Today is his day. Mine was last week. We both enjoyed the little things on our birthdays, such as:

• doing laundry with John;

• a moment when Clara and June held hands on a log, and then fell into a lake;

• a ballet show with earnest performance expressions;

• an end-of-the-day hike, for me (and 4 kids);

• a soccer game with 20-somethings and only one pulled muscle, for Jeff (and 4 kids);

• homemade books and homemade cakes. Will does the cover, and the girls fill the inside with pictures. Jeff chose a slightly inappropriate theme: "Mom is the Bomb." (My kids now know how to decorate a cake with green and red bombs.) We countered with "Rad Dad" on a surfboard. Dorky terms slightly above the kids' heads are somehow a great source of humor.

• Dinner at Chipotle;

• A family dance party. The dance party is most indicative of the time: One dancer wears brown loafers, one takes pictures, one does ski jumps off the couch in a homemade Harry Potter robe, one attempts handstands and backbends, one twirls in a fancy dress, and one just wears a dumbfounded, exhausted stare.

The night before my birthday, we all went out to eat. Walking back to our car, we passed a reflecting window and everyone indulged me with a picture. The texture is kind of strange, but I like it. I like June's winter hat with her size 2 dress. I like John's fancy shirt. Clara is in a Clara pose, and Will has a smile. Family photos for us are rare, but I appreciate having one on my birthday. Just the chance to see us in front of some turquoise truck, clumped together and still.

One Mother's Feelings on the First Day of School

Yesterday, I bought a new baby carrier for my 1-year-old. Today, everyone is back to school. Is there a connection??

The whole family walked into Will & Clara's school together, but quickly dispersed. Clara and Will found friends, as did Jeff and I amongst the parents. I actually didn't even get a real hug goodbye from either child. Holding squirmy John makes that challenging, and everyone was happy, so we just walked away. From the oldest two, that is.

I know that there are so many different feelings on the first day back to school. My pattern is to cry much of the day, out of sadness missing their presence, and just sad that they're growing up so quickly. But it's a bit easier this time. The kids are ready, excited even. That's happy! Not sad. And everyone is healthy, and generally optimistic, and open-hearted. That's happy! Will is psyched about his lice check. That's happy! Clara is psyched to find Will at recess. That's happy!?? And I get to be there to pick them up, rather than be in an office. That's happy! And in between, I am actually getting some time to myself (with a sleeping child). That's wonderful!

There are so many transitions in life - so many beginnings and endings. So many of the transitions are marked by public rights of passage - like a new grade at school. But, I'd rather not take ALL my emotional ques from these events. I can choose some of my own triggers.

So I do feel sad and a little empty, but ok with it. I'll have a little less kids, but a little more time to play music in my life. A little less fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants parenting, and a little more order, in our house and maybe our heads, too. A little less constant energy in our home, but a little more room to think about the energy we want in it.

You never know how the feelings from transitions will manifest themselves. If I thrive on that craziness, on that inability to ever really feel on top of things, (and honestly, much of the time, I do), I can always get chickens, a dog, and some bunnies. The kids would love it!

Challenge Hike

Each year before school starts, we do a challenge hike. For the older kids and the baby. And for me. It helps me punctuate our summer. It makes me feel full to have an amped up experience before school begins.

It was Clara's first time to do the hike. Will had done it when he was 6, too. (That time, I had June on my back instead of John, who was in my tummy, unbeknownst to me.) This year, it was challenging due to the hike itself and due to our time crunch. We were an hour late picking up June from preschool. Living by the clock is an eye-opener!

We fittingly wrapped it all up with finger knitting at the ice cream store.

Sticks and Stones

Today, we immersed ourselves in sticks and stones on the riverbed. A good earthy day before heading down the mountain.

Photo AND title credit to Jeffrey C. Hartman.

Stay tuned for his future blog: "Welcome This".