Today, my son begged and begged for a thing I just couldn't (and shouldn't and wouldn't) deliver. We were at a park, and he wanted to find "Poppy," the perfect acorn. Nothing fit the bill. I couldn't make it right, nor could a genie in a bottle or a million dollars. Yet, sitting with an agonized child, sitting with their agony, is not a simple task.
Also today, I begged and begged a police officer to give me a warning rather than a speeding ticket. The traffic and construction crossing town was unpredictable, and about 1/4 mile from school, I got stopped. I don't think the officer felt my agony, nor did he feel any agony in giving me the ticket.
I don't want to parent like a police officer. I don't want to set my kids up to expect rigid people and a rigid world. I want them to feel room to be creative, with words and deeds. But, I also want them to go the speed limit, and accept cold consequences when they come, be it a lost acorn or a humiliating fine.
Oh, no! 'Reminds me of the ticket I got taking you to Mrs. Howe's play school. She had a lesson on "Policeman Friends" that day, after you had excitedly run up to her, telling what happened. I still remember that vividly. You'll remember this too :).
ReplyDeleteYou are such a wise parent! Loved this! I remember, too, vividly the time that Susan got stopped in Kalamazoo in a school zone. Malcolm was quite small, but old enough to know about policemen and their duties. He wasn't distressed at all, and Susan didn't argue at all, but I am wondering now if he remembers this event, as if was to him quite dramatic at the time! Malcolm is now 13 years old....
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